Motivation: Paying Off Debt

Hello Hello!

My current focus has mainly been on personal finances and paying off my debt. I graduated university almost a year ago and my debt has never looked as bad as it has since graduating and moving 700 miles away to be with my husband. I chose to attend a private university, got married, got a credit card, and used said credit card to pay for the moving truck and initial housing costs. It was also difficult for me to find work during this time because I did not live in the area yet and because my Spanish was atrocious after studying Japanese for 4 years. 

Rejections after rejections were really disheartening and after about 4 months my self-esteem was at an all-time low. After awhile, I figured that I'm just going to have to make the move without a job lined up if I want my husband to be there for the move. FYI, the military's vacation time AKA block leave is for about 2 weeks in the summer and about 2 weeks in the winter, so my time was limited if I didn't want to make the move alone. Family members did offer to make the drive with me if I needed the help, but it would have made the move even more expensive since they would have to find a way back home afterwards. 

At this time, the Army was also taking its sweet time figuring out that we were now married, despite turning in the paperwork twice. This made money even tighter. To make the move, "we" (mostly I) decided that if I couldn't make the move during the summer then I wasn't going to move at all. If I was going to wait 6 more months before trying to move again, I would likely have found a decent job close to where I was living with my mom. To a certain degree, I regret using the credit card I got for "just in case" to pay for the moving expenses and housing. 

Did I mention that I had packed up my little blue car with as much as I could and was already in the house? Essentially I found a place for us to live that would still rent to us despite my husband's terrible credit and moved in with just clothes, a sleeping bag, alarm clock, and a couple other items. My cats stayed with my mom for a bit longer while I tried again to find work and gather money to move everything else. Eventually I got a call from a Chinese restaurant asking me to come in (and naturally the following day I got a call from a smoothie place I really liked). 

Retrospectively, it was definitely tough starting out at the restaurant because they wouldn't give me many hours, they didn't want to have 2 cashiers at the same time (hard to shadow someone that way), and honestly the menu and prices were overwhelming. The shifts were shorter, but I always left more tired since it was 5 hours of solid customer service, cleaning, being on my feet, and feeling lonely. Once I finally got the hang of things, much later than I would have liked, they gave me the sort of hours I had been looking for from the beginning AKA 20 - 40 hours a week. 

It wasn't until recently that I got a call from the temp agency I had been working with that things got a bit complicated (and I will likely dedicate a whole blog post soon). At this exact moment, I have been working in the Medical Records Department now for 2 weeks and it looks like this job may turn out to be a permanent gig. I cried when I found out that i could work 40 hours and not have to work evenings or weekends. I really like the people at the Chinese restaurant, but the hours were not ideal. I also was going in on days that I wasn't originally scheduled on to cover for people who got sick to make any extra money I could.

Ironically enough, 5 minutes ago they called and asked me to come in tonight from 4PM to close (to which I said yes). 

My Advice: Always say yes when you are trying to save money or put money towards your debt. I fall into the latter category at the moment.

If you have never heard of Dave Ramsey and you are struggling with your finances, it's time for you to do some research. In particular, his "Debt Snowball" concept is one that I like and am working on following. The idea is to write down all of your outstanding debts, put them in order from smallest to largest, and give it your all to pay them off in that order. As you pay off your smaller debts you will feel more accomplished and ready to face the final monster, like your massive student loan debt. 

I have been putting as much as I could towards the credit card as possible the last couple months when I figured out the minimum payment was going to do absolutely nothing. I'm proud to say that at the end of May, it should be completely paid off. The nice credit card representative over the phone was able to give me what the balance would be if I was to pay it off by May 31st, so I was able to split that in half to find out what Mike (my husband) and I would each be paying towards it. 

After getting off the phone with Jonathan from Montana, I opened my computer and watched a video (that I linked below) since it was an open tab. I like his basic 3 questions about motivation.

Can You Do It? AKA Can You Work Hard, Save Hard, And Not Give Up?

Will It Work? AKA Do You Know How You Will Do It And Can You Stick With It?

Is It Worth It? AKA What Will You Gain From Paying It Off?

If you answer yes to all 3 questions, then you are good to go. When (not if) I pay off my credit card I will have freed myself of that burden, learned how I can do something about my situation, feel accomplished, learn how to stick to a plan and budget, and put myself into a better situation financially and with my credit. I believe I can do it. I believe you can do it. Figure out what you have control over and do something about it. 

We are not victims of our circumstances. We are capable, intelligent, and worth it.  

If you're interested, here is the video I'm talking about:

"The Psychology of Self-Motivation"

Scott Geller

Have an awesome day!

Why Do We Work

Yesterday in particular, I was stuck in between the proverbial rock and a hard place. Months earlier, I had serendipitously run into the Director of HR of a company that I had worked for through a temp agency doing data entry. Looking for advice and the smallest inclination towards an HR position, I contacted them later for advice from their perspective as a professional. After they possibly put in a good word for me and I interviewed, I got the job as an instructor.

It's not that I have ever had the desire to teach, but the material and content was exactly what I had been craving. The downside being that I would have to wait a couple months before starting, so that I wouldn't have to quit my other job.

After not hearing from the temp agency as of late, I was a bit surprised to get a phone call about a possible job interview. It sounded interesting and I told them as such. After catching up a bit, I found out that my temp agency and my new teaching job had an agreement that they couldn't hire me without going through them first.

As I expected, I found out this morning that I can't have the job anymore. I felt an odd blend of relief and disappointment. However this loss now opened up my schedule to allow for the position that I was to interview for. After considering the options of doing both jobs versus picking one, I decided to invest my time and energy in the new job.

When I thought about why I had stayed with the Chinese restaurant for so long, I figured out that I mainly stayed because of the people and for some money to put towards food, debts, and wants as my husband (thankfully) makes enough to cover the main bills.

I soon realized that a job or career is supposed to be the means to a goal, not the end goal that we have made it out to be.

Minimalist Haul & Shopping Intentionally

Within the No Waste movement there is an important lesson on shopping intentionally that I think is important to discuss. After depositing my paycheck and making a credit card payment at the bank, I decided to finally go buy jeans. My jeans tend to wear down on the inner thighs since I do lots of walking. My first thoughts we to go to Academy or Old Navy, but then I remembered that I could probably find decent jeans for a heck of a lot cheaper at a thrift store.

Rule #1 : Buy secondhand whenever possible.

According to Google Maps I was 1 mile away from the nearest thrift store called Savers, which looks a lot like Goodwill. On the inside, the housewares and such are to the left and the clothing to the right. I wandered through the aisles and came across a shovel (which is on our To-Buy List for scooping dog poop) and a wok (which would solve the problem of not having a large enough pot to use when cooking on the stove). They were $3 and $6 respectively. Obviously, the shovel is a bit broken, but my husband said he would never need it to actually dig any holes so it's perfect.

As a bit of a packrat, it can be difficult not to just buy something purely because I like it. That's why you should know what you need before you ever go to a store. My memory is not the greatest, so I use shopping lists religiously.

Rule #2 : Know what you need.

The hard part is when you start walking around is see things you hadn't thought about or don't need. If you can stick to your guns and not buy impulsively, then go you. For example, I entered Savers with the intention of buying jeans and still ended up spending almost $30. Had I purchased "wants" as well as "needs" then it could have been worse.

Rule #3 : Take a picture of the "wants."

The 2 main items that I found that I would have loved to purchase (but don't need) included a classy set of dishes and a chips and dip serving dish. This sort of pattern on the dishes is one of my favorites and it even matches the shower curtain from the tiny house I lived in when I was in college. On the other end of the spectrum style-wise, there was an adorable chips and dip serving dish that was shaped like a swimming pool with a diving board and hot tub.

Maybe it's because I'm a millennial, but I love taking photos of everything. It was not until I tried sticking to a shopping list in an effort to save money that I realized photos could serve another purpose. By taking photos of the things I wanted and didn't need, I could live vicariously through the next person who would own it. This method also works if you go out to eat and your food or drink looks cute, fancy, or interesting.

Rule #4 : Give yourself time. 

If you leave the store that day and spend the next couple days or weeks regretting not purchasing the item, then that's when I believe it is worth considering going back to buy it. Keep in mind that these are "wants" not "needs."

The last of my five rules is only in regards to clothing and comes from going through and downsizing my wardrobe many times. In my opinion, the only clothing that you should keep are only those that fit well, fit comfortably, are within your personal sense of style, and are items you will wear more than once. If you have to make alterations or keep fidgeting with it, then you probably won't wear it much.

Rule #5 : Only buy clothes that you love.

I'm so glad that I was able to find a pair of black jeans, a structured black skirt, a shovel, and a wok today. Even though I only went in looking for jeans that I can wear casually and can wear to work, I have also been wanting a black skirt and needed a couple other items that I had not expected to find at Savers today. I'm also pretty happy that as an added bonus there are built-in shorts under the skirt (AKA skort?). Gotta enjoy the little things.

If you are looking for ways to try and save money, I hope my trial and error methods can help you when you next try and resist the temptations of straying from your shopping list.

Discovering My Mission

Originally, I started this blog for selfish reasons, by which I mean the electronic equivalent to an electronic journal. Now that I have started reading for fun again, I have noticed a theme in the content I truly enjoy. They tend to be self-help through someone's personal narrative. A "How To Declutter" book wouldn't be as interesting and meaningful as someone's story in response to utilizing said book to declutter their home and life.

That said, I have not been blogging much lately because I feel rather stuck as of lately. I feel like I need some sort of life change, but I'm not sure what. It would be awesome to learn a real trade or skill and not just soft skills that can apply anywhere. I'm not unhappy working as a cashier at a Chinese restaurant, but this is not a career and after second guessing my calling in Human Resources, it has me feeling lost.

What do I do when I feel lost or unhappy? I like to create.

One of my favorite methods of creation is writing. There is something really freeing about just writing without any idea where you are going. I will often write about the daily stuff (what I'm feeling, ideas I have, wants and desires, conversations I have had recently, and so on). There is a tiny book called The Daily Bones (I believe) that inspired me to do so. I don't journal every day, but I do when I need something back from it.

Today I felt like writing in my other "journal" and as I lay in bed unable to fall back asleep, I thought about what sort of changes I have been wanting. I guess I'm unhappy, but I don't really feel that way. The Universe seems to be telling me it's about time to change something.

One of my first thoughts went back to a conversation I had with a friend from college about what sort of business would I open if money was no object, but if I was to ever open a spa I would be no help for the real work because I don't know how to do hair, skin, nails, eyelash extensions, massage therapy, chiropractic... nothing. I have "soft skills" and could learn how to run the business and take care of my employees, but I would never be able to cover for one of them if they got sick or had an emergency. Opening a business right now would not be a good idea then.

Could I make money off of my blog? Maybe one day, but that's not the point.

Ok, so back to the drawing board AKA a small teal notebook with big white poke-dots and pink binding. Without looking through the previous pages of ideas, I wrote about what I aim to do every day which is essentially to "make today a happy day." I'm borrowing the wording from one of my favorite hoodies that I found at the UNIQLO near my host family's house when I was studying abroad in Japan. It's a pastel yellow with a picture of Mr. Happy surrounded by the words "Today is a Happy Day." Something I have learned is that if it makes me smile, it will often continue to do so long afterwards. Side note, I'm currently wearing it because my house is freezing cold.

Could my happiness journey be my schtick? Why not?

Lauren Singer's Trash Is For Tossers focuses on living a zero waste lifestyle, Simon's and Martina's Eat Your Kimchi (now also Eat Your Sushi) focuses on food and traveling adventures in Korea (and now Japan), Tanja's Rose Shock (AKA @RoseShock) focuses on creative makeup and cosplay, Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus write about intentional living and minimalism at TheMinimalists.com, and and the list goes on. You can literally blog about anything, but it appears that you must have a cohesive theme of focus.

Would anyone even be interested in my ideas about living happier and with intention? There only has to be one person.

Everyone should be living a life in line with their personal values. Lauren is a perfect example of this and she really inspires me to live intentionally. By "living intentionally" I mean that you live a life that aligns with what is important to you. The Minimalists have an awesome podcast on the subject.

I haven't quite figured the wording yet, but I make an effort to live my life is by enjoying the little things, by making today a happy day, by using and doing things that make me smile, by making an effort to appreciate how blessed I am, and by living in a way that aligns with who I am and who I strive to be.

I know that happiness is internal. It does not come from external sources, as awesome as that would be theoretically. It's definitely a challenge sometimes to keep negative external influences from affecting my mood, but there are so many more positive things going on that I feel my quality of life has gotten so much better. Since graduating college, I stopped taking antidepressants, was exercising regularly (I have since fallen off the bandwagon and need to get back on), talked to family and friends regularly, ate healthier, and overall these made me feel better.

Mental health, Happiness, and Intentional Living are so important.

If my story helps even one person, then I have done my job.

(Updated: August 12, 2017)

Five Things I Love About El Paso

Hello!

I have been watching a bunch of Simon and Martina's YouTube videos lately. If you haven't heard of them, they are a Canadian couple who lived in Seoul, Korea for about 8 years and just recently moved to Tokyo, Japan. Simon and Martina are absolutely adorable and do videos focusing mainly on trying new foods and exploring new places.

In a weird way, they reminded me about how much I love to explore and about how I'm living in a city relatively far away from home. I was thinking about the random things that surprised me when I first came here and wanted to share them here on my blog (that I have been sadly neglecting). Without further ado (Side note: I googled how to spell that since I have never actually written that phrase down before), here are five random fabulous things I have discovered in El Paso, Texas.

1) Hot Cheetos & Queso (and Mexican Food in general, YUMM)

2) Wide Right Lanes (instead of a third lane)

3) Club Music on the Radio at Noon and 5PM (great for trapped in traffic jam sessions)

4) Extra Front and Back Doors on Houses (which makes me feel safer and I can air out the house)

5) Rock Fencing (which just looks cool)

There have not been a whole lot of things that I particularly dislike about El Paso other than the amount of straight sunlight (it's a sunburn waiting to happen) and the spiky sticker plants (which are the equivalent of stepping on spiky legos). Overall, every place in existence has interesting things that are new and different. In my opinion, you don't have to travel internationally to find a bit of culture shock.

I hope y'all have an amazing day!

Small Life Update

Hello everyone,

This week I have noticed how much of my time seems to be slipping away from me as of late. My ability to reference how much time has passed, how long ago I did something, and what all I did (say yesterday, for example) is not the greatest, so I may not be as accurate as I would like to be.

Last weekend, I drove across Texas to my hometown of Houston, which was a rather long and boring drive. My husband was supposed to go with me since he had a long weekend, but they decided to put him on call so he couldn't leave the area. The drive would have gone way faster had he been able to go, but that's always the case with road trips. Thankfully, I was able to see not only my family, but his family (even if only for a little bit). I'm so grateful to have a good relationship with my in-laws since apparently that's one of the top issues that arises within marriages. Maybe that's a good blog post topic for another day.

Back to the story: My main reason for visiting my in-laws was to pick up the newest member of our family, Kruella, which I decided to shorten to Ella for obvious reasons.

Now that I have had her for a week now (Mike has been out in the field doing army stuff), I have a better feel for her than I did at my in-laws house. She also did really well on the drive and spent most of the time staring out of the window. The getting out of the car for gas and bathroom breaks was a completely different story.

We will definitely have to work on her barking at new people, other dogs, walking on a leash without pulling the whole time, and listening (this she has gotten a whole lot better at thankfully). Overall I'm glad to have her, even if she can't bear to be apart from anyone for very long.

The Love of My Life

While I have not been taking photos for the 2017 Tiny Moments February challenge, I do try to take photos of moments like these that make me smile or laugh. I love running across old photos and remembering the moment. I did say I wouldn't post this photo on Facebook, I never said I wouldn't write a mushy blog post about him on my blog that no one reads :) Look at how cute they are all snuggled up and fast asleep. 

Today is Valentines Day and even though it's a made up holiday to get lovers to appreciate each other and unnecessarily spend money on flowers and chocolate, it's nice to have an excuse to celebrate. He's not really one to buy me flowers, but that makes it more meaningful to me when he does. Its rather funny that I caught wind of the surprise flower delivery via an email from UPS though. I never thought I was a big flower person, but in reality I love getting a bouquet of flowers, especially stargazer lilies, sunflowers, and roses. 

Neither Mike nor I are perfect, but I'm glad we have made our relationship work. It definitely helps that we have similar values, have overlapping senses of humor, can compromise, and both make a consistent effort to tell and show the other person that they are loved and appreciated. We fight just like everyone else, but we learn about each other from them. Mike has added so much to my life and I'm so grateful that I can be myself around him. There are moments where we will leave from being around other couples who do things differently, our eyes will meet, and we will sigh or crack up. Never forget to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you, show them that you appreciate them, and do stuff together. Meaningful relationships, romantic or not, are so important.